CINDY FEENEY

My sister died of cancer in December 2004. In the time before her death, hospice provided her with emotional and physical support. Hospice helped to keep her comfortable so she could spend time with her family in a kind and caring hospice facility.

I hope you take the time to read her full story so you understand not only who Cindy was but how Hospice helps patients like my sister, and why you should support the Hospice 100 Benefit Ride and Mountain Bike Race.

In Cindy’s words:

I was born during the summer of 1961 in Miami.  South Florida was a great place to grow up with my two brothers. Our parents took the family on long summer vacations, packing up our old camper so we could travel all summer. I loved being in the wilderness and away from crowds. I grew up loving animals, plants, birds, fresh air and scenery. 

During our travels, I learned how important it was to preserve nature. My mom loved to care for plants and animals and I soon became a plant and animal lover. If I found a plant that was dying, I would nurse it back to health and give it to someone as a gift.  If I found a small animal that was hurt, I nursed it back to health and released it into the wild. As I grew older and since I liked helping plants and animals, I began to wonder how it would feel to help people.

When I was old enough to volunteer at South Miami Hospital, I gave it a try and I was able to ride my bike to and from the hospital. This was great. I was helping people when they needed it the most and I felt great. During this time I discovered nursing, so I enrolled in nursing school, studied hard and graduated. I loved the excitement of working in the emergency room. I worked in the ER at So. Miami Hospital, the trauma center at Memorial Regional Hospital and the ER at Memorial Pembroke Pines.

My personal life was also great.  I was married with 2 beautiful children, a boy and girl. I loved them very much and I taught them everything that I knew about the outdoors and nature. I got them involved in scouting and was a Girl Scout leader and on a Boy Scout committee and adventuring advisor. My love of the environment got me involved in the Audubon Society, the Nature Conservancy, Wildlife Care Center and Flamingo Gardens. I loved working in my garden with plants and I had a large orchid and palm collection. 

I loved to travel with my children just as I did when I was a child. I introduced them to kayaking, canoeing, snow skiing, white water rafting, rock climbing, mountain biking, hiking and camping. The challenge of the outdoors was exciting and I ascended Devils Tower in Wyoming twice, and I section hiked the Appalachian Trail and Florida Trail. The latest sport I discovered was mountain biking.

I cherished mountain biking and the people who participate in it. They are so friendly and helpful and soon became my extended family. I loved the challenge that mountain biking presented me, especially the physical challenge of endurance racing. There was one 12-hour race at Markham Park in Sunrise Florida when I raced solo and beat most of the men. That felt awesome! During that race, I had a problem with my neck that had been bothering me for a while.  It started being painful about a month earlier and really hurt after the race so I went to the doctor.  The doctor asked if I had done something to injure my neck. Well, I thought for a second, and then I said that I was a mountain biker and often crashed.  The doctor concluded that I had a soft tissue injury and prescribed anti-inflammatory medication.

The pain continued, then got worse, so I went back to the doctor for another examination. A CAT scan of my neck and head revealed a suspicious area about the size of a Key Lime inside my head.  A neurosurgeon operated to remove it, sending a sample to the lab. With my nursing experience I knew this wasn’t good.  A few days later the diagnosis was back - Not good, it was cancer.  The cancer had started in my lungs then spread to my spine, head and various other organs. Oh my God - panic set in, what am I going to do?  Through the panic I realized I would fight the disease all of the way.

Two weeks later I went to the Bahamas with my brothers and family. We spent time snorkeling on the reefs and enjoying being together in the islands. Upon my return it was time to begin treatment. The radiation sucks and made me horribly sick, but the spots began to get smaller. Could I be winning the battle?  And the chemotherapy was even more terrible. I could feel it go into my veins and it would make me sick for about a week. The chemo also stops my training and conditioning.

The days before I went to chemo I would ride my mountain bike as much as possible because I knew that after chemo it would be a while before I got back on the bike. One time when I was at chemo on a Monday after a weekend of great riding, the doctor looked at my arms and legs because they were all scrapped up and asked what I had done.  I proudly announced I was mountain biking all weekend. The doctor looked at me, saw I was enjoying my life and said “I am glad that we are able to help you but does your neuro-surgeon know you are doing this since you are missing a piece of your skull?”  Now, what do I say? I thought for a second and confidently said, “oh, he knows!” It was a lie, but I did not want cancer to keep me from enjoying life.

Well, it’s been 1 year since I was diagnosed with cancer and while I had made a lot of progress it now it looked like I might be loosing the battle. I can’t ride my bike anymore. The local mountain bikers bought me a stationary bike so I don’t loose conditioning. Damn, this cancer is tough! I was so tired all the time, however, I remained confident that I would beat the disease.

I looked around my room with mountain bike posters everywhere and said to myself, “maybe in a few weeks I will get better.”  Except it got worse by the week. It became hard to walk and the pain was unbearable. The cancer spread and was attacking my bones and spine. Maybe the new chemo will work. I can beat this - I know I can. I have to come back. Help me please, I do not deserve this. All I want is to help people, live my life and enjoy the outdoors.  The daily pain was unbearable as the cancer had now destroyed my spine and ribs. I could no longer move but I could see all my family, friends, co-workers and mountain bikers who came by to visit with me. I thank them all. I was hoping that I could pull this one out in the 11^th hour but it doesn't look like I can.

I am now under hospice care at the hospital I once worked at so all of my co-workers can come by to visit.  My family and closest friends are here but I am having a hard time recognizing them. I just want to go out in the wilderness and enjoy nature. It is time to say goodbye. I have lived a great, fulfilling life. I love my family and dear friends so much but I have to say goodbye now and I will look for you all at the top of the next hill.

Cindy lived 8 more days. Hospice kept Cindy comfortable with pain medication until she slipped away. Hospice provided Cindy’s family with professional counseling, caring assistance and even flew her brother in from North Dakota so the family could spend Cindy's last Thanksgiving together.

Hospice care was a godsend for us all.

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Ride on Cindy.

HospiceCare of Southeast Florida is proud to present the Cindy Feeney memorial award to the Hospice 100 rider who best portrays Cindy’s spirit and enthusiasm.

Ride for hospice, ride for Cindy, and ride for life.